Wet Paint and Memories

Memories are like a coat of wet paint on the walls in a busy narrow street.

They’re not gonna stay the same.

Being a ’00 baby

I was born in the year 2000. I entered into the world like a boss at the very beginning of a millennia. I made history when I opened my eyes. The doctor said “OMG, this kid is special”. He didn’t say OMG because I was cute or cried for my milk like an 80s rockstar. He said OMG because I was born in the dopest, swaggest, and most practical year of the 21st century. 

Being born in 2000 puts me at an advantage over everyone else in the world, save the few that were chosen to hold the same title as me. What is the title, you ask? 

We are called ’00 babies. 

Did I make it up? Not really.

I know. I know…

According to The Free Dictionary and Wikipedia, ’00’ is an acronym for public toilets in Germany and Eastern Europe but that’s not stopping us. On the contrary, we know this is a ploy to take our title away from us. We’re not giving up. We find strength in the jealousy of people born in not-so-cool years. We feed off the envy of those who say they’re better than us because they’ve ‘experienced both the 20th and the 21st centuries’. C’mon. They’re not that special. 

Look at people born in 1987 for example. What a pity. You have no idea how many people who asked them about their birthday ran away because they felt threatened. Can you blame them? It sounds like a countdown after 1. 

Or look at 1969. It looks like 9 did a flip. 

Or  consider 1992. 9 is definitely third wheeling. 

1991 looks like a mirror image gone wrong.

Face it. None of them are cool enough.

I actually even agree with many people who say that it should have been illegal to be born in 2000. It’s just too cool. There’s a line in Scott Pligrim vs The World where Todd Ingram absolutely wrecks Scott and this girl says “In short, being Vegan just makes you better than other people”. I would say that’s the case with us ’00 babies too (pls forgive me Vegans. I lou you all).  There totally should have been a law put out sometime in 1998 (another number I’m not even going to start dissing) that all men and women should, for the sake of the people of the 21st century, master their passion and abstain from all activity that may result in ’00 babies.

Imagine if that actually happened. An year that saw no babies. Pampers and Huggies would go bankrupt.  As consequential as it would have been, I think it’s a step people from the 20th century should have taken. 

It should have even been a matter of security. Such a high number of zeroes in someone’s birthday is scary. After all, zero is like the most secretive number ever. Kids don’t even know that it’s a legit number until they learn about Whole numbers in primary school. In some cases, they don’t know it till after they get into middle school. This is rare but very common with kids who have way cooler things to do than learn about numbers. Even NASA when they do the countdown for their launches makes sure you never hear the zero. They blame it on the rockets. I don’t believe that for a second.

You have to know that I’m extremely grateful to have been born in 2000. I came pretty close to losing the title. Thank God my mom didn’t meet my dad a year before. What a disaster it would have been to be born in 1999. At the cusp of making history but falling down into an abyss of numbers that are not special at all. A bottomless pit of numbers that lack the abundance of the magic of the 0 (cue choir Aaahs). 

Imagine all the recognition and fame I would have missed out on. It would have been such a pity. But it would have been a greater loss to have missed out on the practicality that comes with being born in 2000. I just need to look at the last two digits of the current year to know my age. Believe me when I say it’s a much faster process.

If after all that I’ve said you still don’t believe me, I don’t blame you. Most ’00 babies are still on their way to becoming famous and successful. But mark my words when I say we will take over the world. 

Peace, hugs, and love.

P.S. If you were not born in 2000, hit the like button. If you were, where the heaven have you been all this time??? 

Author’s note:
The above post is part of a series called ‘Mumbo is Jumbo’. This series will look at seemingly silly ideas and make them weirder. Some are meant to be funny, while others are meant to bring out the aesthetic qualities of an experience. This particular piece was inspired by my belief that being born in 2000 is cool.

Sunshine Blogger Award

Once in a while, some really kind person sends an award nomination my way and I get the time to work on it. I am really sorry if I there are others who have sent me award nominations and I have not done a post on them. I really appreciate you guys and these nominations really make my day. I never thought I would find such a friendly audience. I am not talking about numbers, I am talking about kind and supportive you guys are. So thank you, for making this blog a great blessing.

We have one great blogger to thank for this post. Alan over at Fuel For The Race writes some amazing stuff. He’s one gem of a person and I can’t thank him enough for the kind words he said about me. Do go over and show him some love.

About the award:

This award is given to creative, positive and cheerful bloggers by other bloggers as a token of appreciation and admiration.

Here are the rules:

• Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link back to him/her.

• Answer the 11 questions provided by the blogger who nominated you.

• Nominate 11 other bloggers and ask them 11 new questions.

• Notify the nominees by commenting on one of their blog posts.

• List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award logo on your post.

Here are the questions that Alan asked me and my answers to them:

Who encouraged you to launch a blog?

The truth is that nobody did. I was genuinely interested in the concept of being able to connect with people I probably might never meet through my writing. Blogging was also a great way of recording my thoughts. I wanted WordPress to be like a hard drive for my creativity. That being said, my family has always supported my writing. Their encouragement has been a great reason why I have been able to keep going. A lot of credit goes to my parents who have sponsored me since my birth. Whenever I’ve needed something to further my talents, they’ve always been very generous.

Who was your first blogger-friend & what drew you to that writer?

This is a very hard question because there were many. I can’t think of one single person specifically. But the ones who were there were so supportive. From giving me suggestions to praying for me, a lot of my blogging friends have become friends in life. I’m very thankful for that. To answer the question what drew me to them, I would have to say it was the sincerity in their writing.

What country, or state are you writing from?

I am currently writing from Hyderabad in India. I study here. But Kerala is my home state.

Has your writing evolved over time & why?

I’d like to think so. Coming to college, meeting new people, the change in the kind of books I read, has influenced the way I write.

Be honest with me on this one.  How often do you consider the unseen spiritual aspect beyond the tangible?  If “never” is the answer, let me know.  It’s okay.  No tricks.

Haha. That’s a good question. I am genuinely interested in the topic. Being a Christian also has made me ponder on such things a lot.

Do you have a pet?

I don’t. But the campus I live in has a lot of tame dogs and cats which is definitely a treat.

When you wake up in the morning, what is your first thought?

Being a college student, my first thought is usually whether or not I have overslept. That usually leads to me frantically jumping out of bed, or a very slow, calm sigh. After that I like to put on some music and get ready for class.

Do you eat breakfast?  If so, what does it consist of?

I usually have a very light breakfast. I have it from the hostel where I live and it usually is some South Indian food. When I’m back home, my mom makes me a very bitter, extremely nutritious smoothie every morning, which gets me going.

If you’re still friends with a childhood pal, tell me what has kept you together?

I never had many friends as a kid. Also since I’m still a teenager, it’s not like childhood was a long time ago. The friends from school I still have contact with are some very kind guys who decided to hang out with a weird kid and make his schooldays a lot more interesting.

What keeps you returning to the same blogger?

Connection. Once I feel like I’ve connected well with someone, no matter the quality of the content they put out, I still like to show up to say hi.

Does your own family read your posts?

Yeah. It’s a great joy.

I’ve decided not to nominate anyone this time. I’ve not been able to read a lot of blog posts and I don’t think I have a good enough idea to do justice to it. That being said, I’m still going to put up 11 questions. You are all welcome to any question you like. It could be a great way to connect, which is what this blog is all about.

My 11 questions:

1. If you could be a teacher, what would you teach?
2. A simple thing about nature that fascinates you.
3. Your favourite spot on the earth?
4. If you could have a cartoon character as your best friend, who would it be?
5. An underrated artist.
6. Something interesting you can do.
7. What do you think is most important in a relationship?
8. What nickname would you give yourself?
9. If you could give water another colour, what would it be?
10. The best blogging tip you ever got.
11. What would you name your autobiography?

I know. These questions are kinda weird. I just wanted you guys to forget about your worries and just be a kid for a few seconds. It helps. I hope some of you answer these. I would love to read them.

God bless! Have a blast existing!

Clothes For My Pimples

Photo by Justin Veenema. Source: unsplash.com

Treat it for what it is. A minute real estate on your face with very little resale value for the next few weeks.

Why do we wear clothes?

Go ahead and google it. It’s amusing to see how the web manages to give relevant answers to questions like these.

We wear clothes for protection, for decoration and mostly to keep what’s private, private.

When Adam and Eve ate from the forbidden fruit. they lost the glory of God that clothed them and they clothed themselves with leaves.

I sometimes wish I had clothes for other stuff. Like pimples and scars.

My skin has a thing for pimples. Despite my mother’s incessant instructions not to pop them, I still do it. And because of this habit I had trouble walking with my head held up high when I was in school. People sometimes don’t see how much pimples can affect someone. It was torture for me. My face used to shrink to the size of a small spot. Metaphorically, of course.

Here I was, a teenage kid with a lot of potential. I had everything going for me. I mean, I did struggle a bit during high school with academics (regardless of which I ended up at my dream university) but other than that, I was doing great. I loved meeting people and having a good conversation. The only thing that kept me from enjoying every single minute of my day most days was the number of pimples on my face. That’s sad.

You do get better at living with your pimples. It gets easier. But I didn’t want to live with them. If I was not responsible for them and they were going to be a part of my life regardless, I could not afford to let them be even the slightest of my worries.

I learnt, though at a very slow pace, that nobody actually cared about my pimples. At least not as much as I thought they did. I also learnt that sometimes not every part of who you are will serve your confidence and that you have to choose what to focus on.

Me being a born-again Christian, realised that it is in God that my value is found. It is his glory that now clothed me and made me who I was. That realisation helped me a lot.

You, dear reader, have to realise that I am talking about a problem that is nothing compared to the millions of problems that are out there. But it definitely is one. Which is why I thought I should talk about how hurtful it could be when you stare at somebody’s pimple or even point it out in public. Even when it seems like it’s no big deal.

Before I go, to all my friends with pimples: Really, it’s not a big deal. Don’t worry too much. Treat it for what it is. A minute real estate on your face with very little resale value for the next few weeks. If you really want to make a mountain out of it, call them volcanoes of purity or call yourself pompously pimplified. I hope that was not gross.

Anyway, if you’ve actually read till here, you deserve an award. Please claim my respect by saying a hi in the comments. Joking. You don’t have to do that. I love you all nevertheless.

Have a blast just existing!

The Right Shoes

I’m an Indian kid doing his undergraduate course in English Literature. Most people don’t know this but in India, the number of kids trying to get into Medicine and Engineering is insanely high. The competition is so high, there are literally lakhs of unemployed engineers. It is in the midst of all this that I decided to study English. When I tell people that I am studying English at college, they are mostly extremely unimpressed. And I can’t blame them, IITs and Medical Colleges rule India. I mean it does hurt sometimes. I mean, I did get into one of the best universities in India and I love what I do. I love it so much that I would rather be at college than enjoy a holiday. I would never be at such a great place in life if I had done what everyone else was doing. A lot of people go through life doing what they don’t love. Instead of their work life nourishing their personal life, it sabotages it.

A few days ago, I made a small track and wrote a small poem (though it’s not a proper poem) to articulate how hard it is to go out and ‘do your own thing’. I hope you enjoy it.

Th track is called ‘Leg-Shoe’ and I’ll share the Instagram link to the track here. You can also listen to it at my YouTube channel at Stef Guitar Geek but there’s something wrong with audio at some parts.

https://www.instagram.com/p/B0Bpv4cHFob/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Here’s the poem. I don’t have a title yet. So feel free to suggest one. 🙂

I feel burnt out. Utterly inexistent

My legs have grown out of the shoes that i have come to love

 I find myself locked into a room full of old worn out shoes

And I must choose. For the world is not for a man with no shoes.

But I can’t. They stink and they are revolting to the eye.

They are torn, bleeding leather, but  they are warm

They are warm because they are worn.

Everyone wears them. They wear ’em till they die. 

Some never even take ’em off. 

They go to bed in them. They bathe in them, some even make love while still in them

They are definitely not for me. My toes want to feel a virgin pair.

So they can in time rest in a pair of their own.

A pair that has formed into the shape of my feet.

Not in worn out shoes they can’t even feel.

But I am locked in. The keys do not even exist.

I do not know how to pick a lock that isn’t there. 

So I examine the worn out shoes.

They are introduced in pairs, yet were undeniably incongruous.

But I persist. I put aside my pernicious eyes of judgement and peek into the intricacies of creation

I see where the needle cut into the leather. I look at the lines and curves.

I search for marks made by time but seldom come across one

But I come across in plenty , marks made by man. 

Marks made in his haste to conquer, but sometimes because he lacked succour.

For years I’ve been dragging my shoeless feet, leading my eyes onto more worn out footwear.

My mission is to make my own worn out pair, a pair that Iooks like my feet.

I pick up the pieces of leather falling off the shelves, I bring them together with the threads that survived. 

I sew them over my feet. Sometimes, I feel a prick or two but never in the same place.

Like the men with the worn out shoes whose toes feel pain again and again.

I really hope this inspires you and encourages you to go out there and do what you love to do. God has a plan for all of us. So be brave!

And as always, have a blast just existing!

I’m Aching To Be Out There

Metamorphosis Behind A Window. Photo by Suzanne D. Williams. Source: unsplash.com

I’m a butterfly. I used to be a caterpillar. Before that, I was an egg. But you don’t know me. Yet. But I know you. I see you through the transparent chrysalis that envelops me. In time we’ll meet. I’m nearly there. I’m a complete butterfly inside a cocoon. How did I get here? It was inevitable. It had to be done. That’s how God made me. It was important for me to shut myself in a cocoon so that I could develop into a butterfly. But now, it’s nearly done. I don’t understand why I have be here anymore. I’m complete. But all in time. But make no mistake, I’m aching to be out there.

Metamorphosis Behind A Window is one of the tracks I made during this summer holiday. I’ll link it at the end of this post if you guys want to listen to it. I couldn’t upload it.

What inspired me: I had been stuck in my room for the past 1 month. Only going out on Sundays to attend church. After going to college, I had a really vibrant social life and being back home and not even going out, I felt trapped. I was looking out of my window, seeing all the cars honking at each other, a sight quite normal to the average Indian citizen. We spend a lot of time in cars stuck in traffic. I was looking out and seeing all this activity and I was back home, stuck in my room. No one shut me in. I just had nothing to do outside. I didn’t have many friends from school that I could go meet. But i had my passion for music. I spent the last two months in my room, playing my guitar and experimenting with music. It was from this, that the track came.

Now, through this track I wanted to convey a message. Here is a butterfly, fully formed, inside a transparent cage( The chrysalis of a butterfly, is usually transparent). Just before it comes out, it has the same potential as it will have when it has come out. I would imagine a butterfly really struggling to come out, considering how it must feel, knowing that it’s complete and yet not being able to go outside. But if you actually look at a butterfly coming out of it’s transparent chrysalis or cocoon, regardless of the amount of movement you see, it looks graceful. It looks like the cocoon and the butterfly are working together to create a release of potential into nature. That inspires me.

We are all undergoing a metamorphosis of our own and there will be times when we feel like we have reached our ultimate potential but are being caged by systems. It’s hard. Because we know what’s out there and we know we are meant for it, just like the butterfly in the transparent chrysalis. But like the butterfly, we must learn to work together with the chrysalis to release our potential.

God loves us. More than we could ever imagine. And sometimes, he gives us cocoons to develop in. We must learn to use it to vitalise our potential. This has a place in every situation in life, be it work, study, or personal development. I believe it is key to enjoying life and reaching great heights at the same time. And I hope that you never ever forget to enjoy life.

Do check out the other tracks and tell me what you think. I really appreciate it. Thank you once again for taking time out of your life to read the stuff I write. It means more than you know. God bless you!!!!

My Instagram page is over at @stefguitargeek

You can listen to the track mentioned in this post here: https://www.instagram.com/p/BxxArFJDY70/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

Some of the tracks are also there on YouTube at Stef Guitar Geek

Silence Is A Perfect Sound

Shhh…..

Silence. In some cases, we strive in our efforts to push it out of the picture. But in others, we love it, are amused by it and find solace and comfort in it.

It’s morning. The sun just peek-a-booed into the sky. The tree leaves moved gracefully in the wind. The branch of a crooked coconut tree  was  somehow serving as an  eyebrow to the sun. The face of the earth was dipped in yellow. A yellow that smelled of novelty, hope, victory and simply colour. It was raining too. But the skies were clear. It always confused me when that happened.

There is a silence in my room. I shift inside my blankets to try and sleep some more but end up just lying there, my eyes squinting into the sunrise. The silence is loud. Outside  the window of my room, the signs of life are so evident, it’s loud. It’s waiting to enter the silence in my room and break it. Not that it is evil. The loudness outside is very beautiful, extremely calming too, ironically. But letting it in, would mean giving up the silence. I would be giving  up a  perspective of reality inside the boundaries of my room. One that I was starting to enjoy.

Silence seems to add an iridescent beauty to all movement. It does so by just existing in a world of inactivity. The only thing that let’s us know it’s there, is time. But when it takes over, it lets you know that it is not brining about a cessation to activity, but rather adding meaning to it. In other words, it is a pause. And I find that so beautiful. If you follow this blog, you would know how much I love playing the guitar. A good musician has to know when to let his instrument speak and when to keep it silent. I would spend hours and hours, honing my skill of knowing when to allow silence to take over.  When silence takes over in the middle of a song, it’s definitely not a cessation of activity. On the contrary, it feels incredibly similar to standing still while your heart is beating like it’s on a rollercoaster. It is according to me, the best example of inertia, but one on an abstract level. And that silence, I find to be an ephemeral display of amazing.

Almost everything I have has some kind of cartoon or doodle. If you look at my laptop, among all the crazy things I’ve drawn on it, you’ll see this:   Silence is a Perfect Sound.  And I hope that today, I have given the world, a muddled up, arcane reason why it’s there. And if you didn’t understand this post, don’t worry. I’m still learning how to put silence in the right places.

 

Never Cliché

Dear …………………………,

I saw a great movie today. A beautiful one.

The sun’s almost down here. The birds are all returning to their modest abodes. If every day was a movie, then this would be a very cliché ending. But yet this is beautiful. Every day is filled with ephemeral clichés that we seem to enjoy with a satisfaction that makes no sense at all. Stefan, haven’t you gotten tired of seeing the sunset, the flying birds, and the full moon? You’ve been loitering on this earth for 18 years. But no, you still enjoy them. They still make sense to you.

The movie I saw today ended with a cliché. And yes, I would have liked it to surprise me, but it didn’t. But yet, it was beautiful, full of meaning. Today, films are trying to survive. Everything is becoming cliché. Around a lakh movies are made every year. New clichés are made every day. Playwrights and directors are rocking their brains left and right to find something new.

Why do I never stop loving a good sunrise? Why do I never get bored with nature?

Is it the acceptance of my unawareness of many of the delicate details I have yet to see? Maybe.

I have a feeling that a cliché becomes annoying only when you are aware of a better possibility. If this is indeed true, then it is the limitations of my imagination that makes me fall in love over and over again with nature, love, beauty and another human being.

And that, I find extremely beautiful. In a world that keeps changing in time, I find it comforting to think that my sheer oblivion to an alternative for many things and my sheer inability to form one, makes what is there everlasting and beautiful.

God, you have indeed painted your glory in the skies and in the most minute vestiges of nature. I can’t find anything to replace it.

Yours,

Stefan

 

 

 

A great quote

Hey guys,

Just wanted to drop in and share with you a great quote I just read over at the blog of one of my dear friends, Stuart L. Tutt. It just brightened up my day 🙂

‘You will also realize that despite the fact you can’t find pants that actually fit you, your body size is perfect. It is exactly that way God designed you to be. You will eventually come to terms with it.’ – Stuart L. Tutt

Go check out his blog at https://stubaby777.wordpress.com/

I’m sure you’ll be inspired. God bless you all! 🙂

A Word On Why Your Words Matter

Dear……..……….

It’s me again. Today I had a really long class. I was so tired after that, that I just walked back to my room and dropped on my bed. After food today, I felt like going out. The night was so young and beautiful. I decided to sit down for some cold lemon tea. I took the longer road this time to get to the tea stall. It’s always nice to take the longer road. You get to say hi to some people and make some small talk. Leaves a smile on your face by the time you reach your destination. I decided to go through some great posts. And I was sitting there reading, sipping my tea, I thought of how much the WordPress community meant to me. It’s such a joy to come here and be encouraged. Over the past two years, I’ve made friends like you who are so good at building people up. And that’s what keeps me hooked. I am still growing.

As human beings, we are constantly looking for affirmation from the other. Every single moment of our lives, we are looking for a smile, a wave, a nod, anything that makes us people worth something. What’s behind our hunger for attention and affirmation?

I looked around. I was halfway down my tea. I tend to do that a lot. I eat and drink faster when I am thinking. I could see the football ground from where I was sitting. Some students were kicking a ball around, getting ready for a match. I turned back to my tea. I’ve heard some people say that our thirst for approval has a lot to do with our need to survive. We want proof that we are relevant. That we are still in the game, still part of the society. I guess that’s one way of looking at it.

But then there is also the possible connection of external affirmation with the approval you give yourself. In this sense, everyone you see, is a mirror. A mirror you look into to evaluate yourself. You see someone and you immediately compare them with yourself. The standards here are usually set by society. They are in a way, universal. You see a bad character in someone and you immediately search for that character in yourself. The disgust you feel towards that character is something you do not want to be associated with. So you scrummage through your past, you comb through your present and you make laws for the future. You see a good quality and you do the same. In this evaluation, you create multiple pictures of yourself that are different. It’s a process that goes on. You are in effect, constantly updating yourself on who you are.

I know I’m boring you. But here’s the point- affirmation does matter.

It is connected with something that is so sensitive- a person’s idea of who he is.

We as human beings, should be aware of this fact. A hurtful word that you can avoid, must be avoided. A smile and a wave never hurt anyone. Of course. there are times when you will have to correct a friend. Correction when done with care, brings about respect and trust.

Teasing and making fun of somebody can seem very harmless, especially when among friends. But essentially when you go down to it, the person at the receiving end feels irrelevant, insignificant and lonely. The Bible has a verse that talks about how with the same tongue you praise God, you curse men, who were made in His likeness. We both need to work on our words, me and you.

So let’s lift people up rather than bring them down. Let’s smile and wave whenever we can and let us be the someone who always has a spare shoulder for others to cry on.

Here at WordPress, I’ve always felt love and encouragement from everyone. That’s what makes it special for me. You keep coming back here, taking your precious time and using it to read what I write. And for that I adore you. So thank you.

I would love to hear from you.

What makes WordPress special for you? Please comment. And thank you once again for reading!

God bless!

Yours,

Stefan