Really? Are you serious?
You usually get that question when:
- You go round for your eighth three scoop vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup, nuts and a final topping of chocolate chip cookies.(I don’t even know if you get that in the market!)
- You play hoopla and lose twenty times and you still pay the bucks because you want that cute white soft teddy.( oh my, that’s over the top. . .)
Please ignore the stuff inside the brackets, it’s just old me keeping me company. . .
So, when do you not get asked that question?
I know, it’s an odd question, but let’s give it a try.
- You walk into an interview, give the interviewer a sweaty handshake and say, “Good morning, sir”, with the best accent you can muster from your lifetime of watching old English movies, when all the while you’re screaming on the inside, “Help me, I’m freaking out!!!!!!!!!!”.
Well, that is a long and interesting answer.
And it is what I would like to talk to you guys today.
We talk a lot. We talk a lot more these days that we have to use Latin words like etcetera(which practically means-I don’t think I’ll be able to finish this!).
When we hear the word ‘talking’, what comes to our mind is a serious conversation, like a debate or a professional or personal exchange of information. But there’s much more in that circle. We say a lot of Good Mornings, pleased to meet yous and Good Days without even thinking about what we are saying. We don’t even care to look at each other’s faces these days.
I used to wonder when I was a kid why these small phrases were even ‘invented’. We use them in places where it applies to nothing we feel on the inside.
Talking of ‘inventions’, how did all this come about? Was there a public announcement that from that day on, ‘Good Morning’ was going to be the way we greet each other every morning? There had to be a time or a point in history when stuff like this mattered. Let’s think about all the possibilities. If this is something that is going to progress over the years, I don’t how many more words will end up in the garage.
But there’s another side to the story. There are times when we use words to elevate other people to a higher level of confidence.
I had this experience a few days ago. Most of you who read my blog would know about my love for the guitar and music in general. Well, I was at this guitar competition for about a hundred schools in our region. I was sitting there, practising my stuff. I was looking around at all the other kids doing their last minute warmups. What I like about competitions is not the prize or the fame, but the experience and the relationships you build up in those places.
Every new person you meet puts down your chance of being alone somewhere in the world by a significant percentage.
So, I am sitting there and I meet this guy. He is an amazing guitarist. He was the one who bagged the prize last year. I’m sitting there looking at him play the guitar and I’m thinking, “Man, I don’t think he’ll even acknowledge my playing”. I am no good at notes. I don’t even know what a clef is! I ask him to play a few chords and I catch up with it with the one thing I know, making a lead for the background. I find the heart in what he’s playing and in no time we’re jamming. When I finish, he starts talking about how great my talent is and how I could take this to a higher level. He’s talking like I am the guy who bagged the prize last year. I know he’s just trying to make things easier for me but there was this tone of truth and friendship that made me believe him. That day, we walked out together. He came first and I came second. He is a part of my victory. The confidence and love he showed to me started a fire in me that I was able to take out on stage.
You can use words to elevate people though they may not actually be the ones worthy of it. But isn’t that like a white lie?
No it’s not. Think of it this way:
When you say to someone, “you are beautiful”, you are not saying that they are beautiful, but that you see them as beautiful. What we do is we give away compliments based on this universal scale. You pick out an average from what you think ‘beautiful’ is like for all the other people in the world and then you use it to give away a compliments and arrive at conclusions.
Try to ignore that and look beyond the global definition. This way, you can give any compliment realising that it is not an exaggerated comment, but an authentic standard set by you.
So what do we do about all this?
We say the Good Mornings with a greater insight and we give away the compliments with a broader heart.
I am going to ask you to join me in a chain reaction that I am going to set off right now with a compliment to you. ..
Know that you are an amazing person, that you are a masterpiece in God’s eyes. A beautiful, talented and confident person who will definitely change this world for the better. . .
God bless you and have a great week!